Cristine's Once Upon a Time

So before my problem was that I wasn’t conscious of what I was eating.  Now I have MFP and I feel like I am moving in the right direction.  I can make healthier decisions.

My problem.  I want to exercise outside, but it’s not really safe to do it alone.  Either homeless people or bears will get me, and you thinks I joke, but in AK it’s how it is.  My husband works too much so I don’t really have anyone to go with!  So I’m stuck inside to walk on my treadmill and I’ll do what I have to do, but I’m not going to lie.  It’s dreadfully depressing.  I want to be outside.

I thought about joining a group or something, but…  I’m afraid.  I have couple of people I could call, but…  I’m afraid.  Gah!  What is wrong with me?  I want to get out, but at the same time I am terrified!!  

Help?

So I’m thanking MFP!  I haven’t lost weight in MONTHS!  But with two days of counting my calories with MFP I have lost three pounds.  Sounds a little crazy to have lost so much so quickly, but I’ll take it! :D

Add me on MFP!  AKGrownGirlie

Wow.  My Fitness Pal.  You have changed my life forever!  I knew I ate too much, but have never counted calories or even kept a food journal.  I’m glad that I signed up for MFP because now I see that I was taking in way more calories than I was burning considering I was only working out three days a week for thirty minutes. No more!

I’m so glad because I was wondering what in the world, I’m working out and I eat healthy foods, but the problem is I just ate too much and not enough fruits and veggies and wasn’t working out enough.  :)  I feel like I’m moving in the right direction now. :)

So I went to the doctor yesterday and was told that I have a nifty new mole right under my butt cheek!  Such a relief.  I must say, it is rather cute!  :)

I can’t even begin to explain how the whole experience impacted my life.  I realized how much I am a prisoner in my own fear and how much I DON’T live my life.  I spend too much time inside, too much time isolated, too much time afraid of the hard work that exercise is, too afraid of sacrifices, afraid of change…  Shoot.  How did I get this way?

Well.  I started My Fitness Pal and I’m new to it, but I think you can add friends and I see a lot of people using that tool.  I’m AKGrownGirlie.  :) If you want to add me or how ever it works. 

Have a wonderful day everyone!  Love you family, and don’t be afraid to step outside of your comfort zone!  That’s what life is all about and how we grow and improve!

So yesterday I did C25K Week 4 Day 2 AGAIN and when I finished that I kept fast walking until I hit 45 minutes.  Then when I finished I did 10 minutes of ab exercises. 

Today I just fast walked 45 minutes and did the ten minutes of crunches.  Tomorrow I’ll do the C25K with the crunches like I did yesterday.  Monday I am taking off and maybe on Tuesday I will do 30DS.  Why am I scared of hard work outs?  Haha!

That’s not the reason this post is entitled F.U.C.K.  The reason it’s entitled F.U.C.K. is because I found a raised spot on my leg.  It’s really dark and it’s like right under my cheek so I can’t actually get a close look at it and taking a picture of it is pretty difficult.  So there was a lot of crying yesterday and some today, too.  I’m trying to stay positive and only think positive things.  It’s hard.  I’ve ALWAYS struggled with negativity, it runs in the family.

Anyhow, Monday I plan on going to see a doctor and I PRAY it’s not….  you know.  Until then I just have to keep busy.  When I keep busy it’s easier to stay positive.  Let me tell you, it sure puts things into perspective.  Bills seems insignificant- yesterday’s worry.  Every little thing I have been moping and whining about makes me want to kick myself in the ass.  Seriously, I have it so good.  I have a husband who loves me and works hard to provide for us, a little house to live in that is perfect for the two of us, the opportunity to take classes to become a teacher, a wonderful and loving family, strength, love….  I mean that’s the condensed list!

Moral of the story! HUG your family!  LOVE every day!  CHERISH every breath! 

P.S. What’s with all these spam followers?

I decided three days a week of C25K wasn’t cutting it!  I’m progressing, but I’m not getting the results that I want.  So I decided to up my work outs to 45 minutes of cardio total 6 days a week for this week, then 1 hour next week, 1.5 the next week and 2 the week after that.  I’ll stick at two hours cardio and work on increasing my intensity.  Plus I am going to include abs at least three to four days a week. 

My concerns? 

1.) I’m worried that 2 hours on the treadmill is going to get boring as… well you know.

2.) I am on week 4 C25K, but it’s SO HARD that I’ve had to repeat it.  This is my second week repeating it so if I repeat it again I’ll be on my 4th week of week 4.  Confusing?  It’s still SO HARD!  I have to repeat it and I just don’t know why it isn’t getting easier!!  HELP?

It’s sunny out, yay!  Irrelevant, but still a good thing.

So I did C25K Week 4 Day 2 (I’m repeating week 4) and I’m actually thinking about repeating week 4 again.  It’s just really hard.  I want to move onto week five with confidence and right now jogging at five minute intervals is kicking my butt!! 

Some bad news, I’ve been eating pretty unhealthy lately.  Family came up and took me out to dinner plus BBQs and what not really are not condusive to a healthy diet.  Then, last night was a girls night after a BBQ so not only did I eat a hamburger and hotdog, I drank three margharitas and went out, drank four more drinks, came home and drank two beers!  Seriously, that’s pretty gross.  And unhealthy.  BUT IT WAS SO FUN! 

Anyway, I believe in living life and not stressing over the small stuff.  I am going to reach my goal, even if eating unhealthy for a few days has set me back.  I’ll still get there. 

STAY HEALTHY and ENJOY SUMMERTIME!! :D

As I was jogging today I was thinking about tumblr.  I was thinking about this great post I was going to write and it was going to motivate so many people.  I was going to say things about just doing it and how no one said it was going to be easy and the truth is that it’s going to be hard as hell.  Now…  I don’t really know what exactly to say. 

This week has been super active for me and I’m so proud.  I jogged week 4 Day 1 of C25K on Monday.  Tuesday I did day 1 of 30 Day Shred.  Wednesday I couldn’t walk.  Thursday I went on a two hour bike ride and today I jogged Day 2 Week 4 of Couch to 5K.  I’m feeling pretty beastly. 

I’m proud of myself.  My legs are sore and they have been almost every day this week.  I am starting to love that feeling.  Its the feeling of reaching my goal.  It’s the feeling of working my ass off with sweat dripping into my eyes and me pushing myself mentally beyond limits I didn’t knew existed.

You can do this.  It’s so worth it.  It’s going to be hard and it’s going to suck, but when you’re done you’ll be so happy you went through with it.  Trust me.  Life will be better on the other side of your work out.  I promise.

I was thinking… This week marks my 5th week working out! Maybe that doesn’t seem like a big deal to anyone but I’ve never done that outside of high school. Three days a week of Couch to 5K.

On top is that, this week I’m increasing to 6 days a week! This is huge! I can do this and I’m excited to make this a life habit!

30 Day Shred day 1 complete! And on the first day of whale week no less! Be inspired! Haha!

I AM going to wear a pretty dress and be comfortable in it for graduation next May!

Now I just have to focus on not eating hormonally because macaroni salad sounds so good right now! Haha!

Holy EFF!! Today was hard! I did it though! I almost puked… I had to lay on the floor haha! Excited/scared for my work out on Wednesday. :) Stay healthy and happy friends!

So I turned 25 and it totally opened up my eyes and gave me renewed motivation to reach my goals.

So I have decided to: 1.) Keep up with C25K 3 days a week (starting week 4 today!) 2.) Start 30 Day Shred 3 days a week 3.) Master my diet

So I keep seeing posts about the importance of diet and I eat only healthy foods. Fruits, veggies, whole grains and some dairy. I take my vitamins and am working on drinking more water.

What is the ideal diet? I really could use some help! :)

Sooo frustrating/excruciating/aweful to love people who don’t love you back. 

Friends.

Family.

Ugh ugh ugh.  Why does it always hurt and I why do I keep loving people who don’t love me. 

/End Rant

I got this.